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ROLL up, roll up. Get your tickets here for the Farage big top experience.
Buy one for your friends, if you have any, it’s the gift that keeps on giving.
Step right up folks. See the amazing disappearing reappearing man. An intrepid fool put his head in a lion’s mouth and a charabanc full of clowns pie each other in the face before the doors somewhat predictably fall off.
Yes that’s right the Ukip circus is in town and what an extravaganza it’s turned out to be. There’s not a seat in the house. In fact there’s only one seat in the whole country.
For those of you who have had better things to do with your time than enjoy the hilarious spectacle of a bunch of bigots tearing each other apart, it started something like this — it’s all been very exciting and curiously biblical.
Farage, after failing three times (well actually it was six, but who’s counting), was crucified on the Calvary of public opinion.
But when his followers rolled back the rock under which it was believed he was hiding, lo, he had disappeared only to
return three days later in a remarkably similar form to when he left.
Now to some superstitious types this has been taken as a clear sign that he is the new Messiah. The second Coming of Nige, if you will.
Others however are less convinced and see him as merely a very naughty boy not to mention a two-faced backstabbing egomaniac.
This led to one of his former disciples branding Nige the false messiah in scripture, well the Times.
Ukip’s economics spokesman Patrick O’Flynn accused Farage of becoming a “snarling, thin-skinned, aggressive” man who is turning Ukip into a “personality cult.”
Now to many this might not seem like much of a departure from his usual conduct but O’Flynn maintained the scales had been lifted from his eyes.
He said the Ukip leader’s behaviour risked the party being seen as an “absolute monarchy” and blamed Mr Farage’s “aggressive” and “inexperienced” advisers.
But he still had his 100 per cent support, apparently.
Farage’s response to his naysayers was effectively to go all Louis XIV and claim, more or less, “L’etat c’est moi.”
Which kind of makes you think the naysayers had a point.
Anyway, on with the fun!